Years ago Matthew Collins was Gerry Gable`s golden boy and Matty and Nick Lowles were prepared to go to prison together after being exposed as a pair of liars and frauds. Matty is notoriously unhygienic and the Pakistani landlord of Matty`s bedsit also rents the same room out to 3000 cockroaches that live alongside Matty in peace and tranquility and harmony, and as a gesture of friendship Matty leaves them some of his pizza when he has finished with it. Matty and his companions frequently party together while listening to the sex pistols, the cockroaches jump up and down doing the pogo to bodies by the sex pistols while Matty shakes and strangles Nick Lowles until he turns Blue.
Hope Not Hate is more than just a couple mates arguing over who`s going to buy the next bottle of White cider, it is an actual organisation although it is prone to bust ups due to Matty`s personal problems such as alcoholism and obesity which Matty can longer hide. Matty frequently insults people from behind his keyboard and ridicules 40 nationalists turning up somewhere to protest against Islamic extremists when Hope Not Hate can only assemble four "activists"per session that have to be warned six weeks in advance and then spend most of their time hiding around the corner just in case a group of "Nazis" appear and accuse Lowles of talking gibber and nonsense and telling lies that are so far fetched they would probably make pinnochio look like a total amateur. Matty is now suffering from depression due to David Cameron`s proposed porn block, because Matty spends most of his time trawling the internet in search of a cheap thrill. Of course Matty is already pulling his pants down this week at the thought of of hundreds of rampaging Blacks rioting over the verdict of lawful killing of plastic gangster Mark Duggan. Lowles and Matty will be super glued to their screens this weekend waiting for news of a violent confrontation with the police over the Duggan death. Any reports of any disorder will send Matty and Nick jumping for joy that Saint Duggan has finally been avenged.
When he is not trawling the internet Matty likes to breakdown culture barriers by paying Black male escorts to spend time with him in his bedsit where Matty talks rubbish till their ears drop off and crawl away to hide in the cupboard to avoid Matty`s dribble about fascists and Nazis. Lowles is a total complete waste of space and a coward and spends his days shoveling excrement out of Matty`s closet toilet due to the system being unable cope with Matty`s excessive bowel eruptions that make an erupting volcano appear silent.
Matty and Nick conjure up stories about the B.N.P being involved in murder plots and assassinations plots which almost portrays an impression that the B.N.P have spies and assassins on every street corner in the country. Lowles likes to make the "far right" appear menacing by telling horror stories about seig heiling tele tubbies at children`s parties and Nazis on steroids beating up Pakistanis and setting fire to their shops, in which the owner conveniently receives a massive lump sum of insurance by a bent Pakistani solicitor. Matty is frequently seen on pub crawls on his hands and knees attempting to order a pint a beer from foreign bar tenders who short change people at every opportunity, which Matty defends to the hilt.
